Awkward Moments. We've all had them. You say or do something that provokes an awkward silence. You know, the kind that forebodes a lonely and painful death-by-embarrassment. Or, rather the kind you wish would forebode a lonely and painful death. Immediately. Because who's going to hold an awkward moment against a dead guy? Sadly, in the cruel, Hobbesian way of the world, death rarely comes when you'd like it to, and you're left standing (awkardly) alone, a husk of a man with only your embarassment to keep you company.
Yesterday, my moment happened in a library, which until yesterday, I had always thought of as a place for the advancement of my mind rather than regression of my ego.
It all started harmlessly enough. My computer was dying and I needed to plug my power adapter into an outlet. The nearest outlet happened to be located underneath a table where a man was sitting. Without thinking (the perfect beginning to a perfect awkard moment), I got down on my hands and knees and looked up at the (nice-looking) man and asked, "Sir, would you mind if I got underneath you?" He said nothing. I'm hoping because he was deaf, but more likely because he wanted the awkwardness of my question to sink into my soul as deeply as possible. Bonus awkardness ensued when the man sitting nearby (also nice-looking. Why are they always nice-looking when you're making a moron of yourself?) began to snicker.
That's when I decided my computer battery wasn't dying that quickly after all, at least not as quickly as I was on the inside, and I retreated to the safety of the (empty) magazine section.
Awkardness: 2, Dignity: 0.